Sunday, April 09, 2006
I was deeply saddened this last Thursday and Friday. I was so affected by what happened that for the first time in 3 years of teaching - I did not want to be a teacher anymore. I have never felt that way before. I have had my share of behavior students. I have never had such a bad problem with stealing before. I had arranged a yo-yo assembly as a drug-free activity. I was supposed to sell yo-yos all last week as a follow-up to the assembly. I found 2 of them missing on Thursday. It had to have been one or more of my students. I searched everywhere and could not find them. I find out on Friday that there was at least 2 separate stealing incidences in my room. I was so saddened that one or more students could steal from me after being in our classroom for so long. We have been together for 8 months now. I spend more time with them than with my real kids. I think I provide an educationally challenging environment. We do many interesting, educational, yet fun activities. I do a monthly movie and snack. I guess it was not enough. Is it a case of more, more, more? It was the first time that I felt such despair. This led me to create this piece. As soon as I saw this pict, I knew that this was how I felt. No matter what I said or did, it would not stop them from doing whatever they wanted. It did not matter what I could have said or done, their characters allowed them to do such a thing. I felt betrayed and deeply saddened. It will be business as usual tomorrow. We are starting on a new writing project. Only this time, I will be more leery and keeping an eye on things more. I should not have to do that. I want to go back to being naive.